Friday, April 29, 2011
月老..
月老他看得到， 他听得到， 告诉我爱是那么微妙..
冥冥中我们， 一个都不能少..
IM ATTACHED!
林彩吉:)
Yang
4/29/2011 11:54:00 PM
Monday, February 01, 2010
知足。
每一刻都会珍惜， 都会把握，
庆幸有你爱我。
阳。
2/01/2010 11:36:00 PM
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Kelong
With the right crowd, the fun just doesnt stop!! Caught my first 2 fishes! hahaha! and played mahjong! ZOMG!!
Kelong is also the place to revise the songs that you know that has seawaves.
笑傲江湖 Swordsman (1990)
導演：胡金銓、徐克
《滄海一聲笑》
作詞：黃霑 作曲：黃霑
滄海一聲笑 滔滔兩岸潮
浮沉隨浪只記今朝
蒼天笑 紛紛世上潮
誰負誰勝出天知曉
江山笑 煙雨遙
濤浪濤盡紅塵俗事知多少
清風笑 竟惹寂寥
豪情還賸了一襟晚照
蒼生笑 不再寂寥
豪情仍在痴痴笑笑
啦~~
Woohoo!!~
Yang=)
10/22/2009 12:12:00 PM
Monday, October 12, 2009
Time.
I din write this. Read.
爱, 需要的正确的时间
一个女人突然决绝的跟相爱五年的男友分了手，闪电般嫁了他人。
她说她要结婚她实在等不起了，而他虽然爱她，却根本没有一点这方面的意思。
过了几年，男人也结婚了。
那个新娘其实未必比她出色多少，或者这一次他的爱有多么深，
只不过她出现的时机实在太好，刚刚好在他萌生倦意想安定下来的时候。
于是，不需要什么更好的理由了，她来得正是时候，那么，就是她了。
其实我们寻寻觅觅了那么久，遍尝每一次爱情的甜蜜与艰辛，
而最后选择的爱人，不过就是在我们心意动时，经过身边的那一个。
什么青梅竹马，什么心有灵犀，什么一见钟情，都不过是些锦上添花的借口，
时间才是冥冥中一切的主宰。
回首往事的时候，想起那些如流星般划过生命的爱情，
我们常常会把彼此的错过归咎为缘分。
其实说到底，缘分是那么虚幻抽象的一个概念，
真正影响我们的，往往就是那一时三刻相遇与相爱的时机。
男女之间的交往，充满了犹疑忐忑的不确定与欲言又止的矜持，
一个小小的变数，就可以完全改变选择的方向。
如果你出现的早一点，也许他就不会和另一个人十指紧扣；
又或者相遇的再晚一点，
晚到两个人在各自的爱情经历中慢慢学会了包容和体谅，善待和妥协，
也许走到一起的时候，就不会那么轻易的放弃，任性的转身，放走了爱情。
在你最美丽的时候，你遇见了谁？
在你深爱一个人的时候，他又陪在谁身边？
在你心灵最脆弱的时候，又是谁在与他同行？
爱情到底给了你多少时间，去相遇和分离，去选择和后悔？
重温《大话西游》，
看到紫霞深爱至尊宝的时候，他心心念念的寻找他的白晶晶，
而当他终于看到了她留在心里的那一滴泪，却已经失去了选择的权利。
每一次看到他潜入另一个人的身体，去偿还前世欠她的一句承诺，
再看他在夕阳下孤独的走远，总是情不自禁的想要落泪。
不是不心动，不是不后悔，但已经没有时间，再去相拥。
如果爱一个人而无法在一起；
相爱却无法在适当的时间相遇；
如果你爱了，却爱不对时间，除了珍藏那一滴心底的泪，无言的走远，你又能有什么选择？
时间的荒野，没有早一步也没有晚一步，
于千万人之中，去邂逅自己的爱人，那是太难得的缘分，
更多的时候，我们只是在彼此不断的错过，错过了杨花飘飞的春，又错过了枫叶瑟索的秋，
直到漫天白雪，年华不再，在一次次的心酸感叹之后，才能终于了解——
——即使真挚，即使亲密，即使两个人都已是心有戚戚，我们的爱，依然需要时间来成全和考验。
这世界有着太多这样那样的限制与隐秘的禁忌，
又有太多难以预测的变故和身不由己的离离合合，
一个转身，也许就已经一辈子错过。
多年以后，才会参透所有的争取和努力，都抵不过命运开的一个玩笑。
上帝在云端只眨了一眨眼，所有的结局，就都已经完全改变。
Maybe its not a lie after all. Maybe its just that you dont want to hurt me. Maybe its just that thats really what you were thinking at that time. Just that people change, people forget, and s/he just had that kind of advantage. Its just coincidence that i had to face this so many times in my life. Im numbed about this already. And I can even start to list 1000 reasons why you should/haf/ought to do this to me. Cos im different already. Im no longer the person that you used to be with. For me now, the idea is: 要像个大男孩,风吹又日晒,活自由自在. Hahaha!
Happy times to come!
Yang =)
10/12/2009 09:27:00 PM
Sunday, January 18, 2009 Labels: 2009, Brothers, happy day, holidays, overseas, photo, pros
2009. 不得不提。
It had been a great year till now.:)
Started off with NO VIVA for my pathology exam. Haha. Proud of myself:)
Watched Ip-man, which was a great movie. It is great and this doesnt stop with me liking the movie, it had already made greater impact on me.
神华内敛
Kukup trip 2009 was GREAT! Thanks to weixiang for organising and thanks to all my friends for this wonderful and fun experience:) Waiting for other pictures.
沧海桑田.
from xuan - 夕阳无限好.
Hope for more fun things to come!:)
Cheers!
Yang =)
1/18/2009 07:01:00 PM
Sunday, September 28, 2008 Labels: happy day, Patience, stupid thing i do, 流浪
今天的天气是云淡风轻.
三个月。
乐天知命， 好难哟。
乐天， 天乐?
知命， 知啥命?
换来心情好的一天。
原来， 这才是好心情。
此生最美的风景。
阳。
9/28/2008 05:26:00 PM
Sunday, July 13, 2008 Labels: happy day
罗志祥的择偶条件
如果你有去观看以上画面， 你会这才发现， 原来罗主任的择偶条件和我的是不谋而和。 尤其是最后那一句。 哇要怎样才强得过他? 你也可以看看， 大概在16分钟的时候。
好不容易， 一切又回到风平浪静。
阳:)
7/13/2008 11:19:00 PM
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Assault vietnam 2008
Well that was our group's name for the vietnam trip in 2008 lasting from 5th june to 19th june. It was fun!!!! Ok here's some pics from me....cos JJ says I had not been updating my blog hurhurzz..
I had only very limited pics for the time being..cos the rest are with the rest of the people..so its not in any order but based on wad did i feel when i took the fotos as i remembered it..
Hello this is me in vietnam..
[insert] TMD blogger ate the rest of my post..TMD hafta rewrite..haha..
Im really in vietnam!! Wearing Ivan Koo koo jiao hat..hahaha..aka scam me helmet..hahaha..it really costs 20 bucks!!
Joy! Come ask me why i take this photo..cos i think its most important to haf fun and joy during a trip..haha and something to note..the brand joy mineral water bottled is the cheapest u can find in vietnam..no joke!:)
Chinook which we saw at the DMZ museum in Hue..i realised that it is very useful to know random knowledge in the field of aviation..hahaha..i nid more random knowledge!!!:)
This is me and The MOST SLEEPY Yikang on the bus when we were running around the DMZ trip on the bus..haha..opps..
Ahhhhh peeling skin from too much yang guang zhai nan in Nuah Trang (Nha Trang) hahaha..well..i was more of thinking jay chou's secret song when i took this foto..飘落后才发现这幸福的碎片/要我怎么捡..haha lame not v nice...hmm..
SP_A0180.jpg)
Haha this is a photo of the only window in the hotel we stayed in Sapa..this was supposed to be the girls' room thats why there's so many flowers..hahaaha..i really like sapa..its this high mountain place that is surrounded by padi and flower fields and villages..it reminds me of assisi which i love to bits..haha..i guess i like mountains more than water..:)
Look at the river!!! Its so damn nice lahhh..haha and the old bridge was damn fun lah..hahaha..sorry..i bet u all wont understand the things i say..well..hmm..yep sorry this pic lun luo to become a random scenic foto..hmm not very scenic either..haha..next..
I like the way the cloud seems to be that low..yet not that high..hahaha..did u see the padi fields??? whenever i see padi fields..especially those yellow and gold and ready to harvest..i think abt 庆幸 by 蔡淳佳..每一刻都会珍惜/都会保握/庆幸有你爱我..
look at this!!! 庆幸有你爱我:)..
oh this is the whole Sapa area seen from the small hut at the top of the whole area..its very very very nice cool and cooling!!:) hahaha but some of us got height phobia..sooo..hahaha..hmm..oh we saw a 50cents restaurant..but din go and eat..haha we not so cheapskate..ohyah sapa spring rolls roxxxxx...sapa hotpots rox tooo! sapa breakfast roxxxx too!!sapa the only problem was rain..i am rain..i like black..black is confident..
The city centre of Sapa..where alot purging were taking place..if u go to heaven..who will u want to welcome you??
I wasnt a voyuer..so only took a few pics of pple in my tour grp..this is yinghao the mouse!! most nice..most zhaiiii..
This is yikang the bear/cow..most hungry..most sharming..most landmine..hahahaha
Thats all from my collection..
Cheers!
Yang =)
6/26/2008 10:43:00 PM
Friday, May 09, 2008 Labels: happy day, huangchengyeyun, Random words., Smart.
是你不会， 还是我不懂?
What you saw as the title of this post was the title of my script for huangcheng about 4 years ago..I still remembered that time when my first script got rejected by laoshi..then i summoned all my crazy and wrote a 2nd one..which later became one of the last 5 scripts..just too bad that i had developed it too late so it wasnt much of a completed piece by then..so got 放逐 in the end still..but more or less i know that it was destined not to get anywhere but my com..haha..
anyway why this title..todae was the last day at imh..psymed up to now had been always schizo schizo schizo and schizo..sometimes..i feel..its just so hard to discern what is schizo..what is bizarre..what is weird..or what is just my naive-ness..sometimes..i kind of wonder..why is this idea weird..why is this linking bizarre..whats wrong with me..
Of course there are alot of things to fall back on when u try to make a decision..firstly..there's this wonderful thing called common sense..but well..whats common to me might not be common to you..toking cok is common to me and i can perfectly blend into someone's toking cok without realising that his mind is a cok..common sense..up to a certain extent..can help me distinct things that is really really bizarre..out of my world..get out of sight..
then secondly..there's culture..cos delusion is a fixed falsified thinking that is not shared with others..so if sth is widely accepted in a community..like cows drink milk..then cows shld drink milk and mebbe not drink water??..yepp..but there's a problem..i only noe abt my culture..and mebbe singapore culture..yep..but thats not exactly a problem cos i will only be practising in singapore..i do wish for the chance to help out in other places but then lets not discuss about it here..anw..its not exactly a problem..but once again..there will alws be some part of the culture that i wont noe..jus like some common sense that i nv found common..
then ofcus..search for evidence for it and against it..delusion is a fixed falsified belief that is held despite of lack of evidence and not shared among others..so the best thing is to keep on asking the patient why is he thinking like that until a certain point when the basics is out..that is there is no evidence..
then there's socratic questioning..ohman i kinda love it..haha..i kinda already acquired this skill thru my toking cok drilling sessions..basically it demands an inquisitive mind..and a training of not to take everything at face value but exert ur sense of responsibility to ask everything in the world..when something is fake..somewhere something somewhat weird out there wont be able to escape from u..ofcus thats when u r really good at it..at least for now..its nice to know that when i think about a question to ask..someone else will actually ask it..so its either my level is as good as theirs..or their level is as good as mine..hahaha
after one week..i realised why i had been so tired in imh everyday..by the time afternoon comes..im already bo-chuping the tutorial and falling asleep or jus pure stoning..its jus simply becos im learning very fast and everything is getting there in a very organised and proper manner..im very happy about it..haha..im really glad that psymed posting had actually brought my mind engine to a start and i can really say that im going back to the days that i thot of doing psymed and now im seriously considering..the other contender being FP..
the best part abt the morning tutorial today was the tutor's analogy of how to discern truth or falsch..he asked..what is erotomania..how do we know if we really know that someone loves us or we r jus being erotomania..sometimes..love has no logic..no common sense..and nothing cultural in it..then..we fall back to the evidence..cos we are not and we noe we shldnt be and we try to dismiss these ideas of erotomania..we all rely on all the evidence to tell us whether if someone loves us anot..the things that she does..the words that she says..the love that she gives..all the evidence for and against..and the rest..are erotomania..hahaha..
I was thinking while listening at that point in time..mebbe i shld haf done more things for all those i had loved in the past..mebbe i had not given them enuff evidence to dispute themselves as erotomania..毕竟， 即使是恶魔在身边， 你也还只是个整天想把我气死的小小小恶魔。
Cheers!
Yang =)
5/09/2008 11:05:00 PM
Saturday, March 08, 2008 Labels: happy day, preparation., TV
幸福
最近， 对于幸福这个课题似乎又有很多的讨论。 似乎是说， 周遭的朋友都对于幸福这个字眼有了更多， 更切身的体会。 有些人开始知道自己的是什么幸福， 有些人还在观望别人的幸福， 希望没有人像我一样， 对这些那些还是懵懵懂懂， 不知所谓， 没有规划， 也没有将来。 刚刚看了公主小妹第11集， 对于小麦所说的幸福， 让我对此有另一层体会。 人生规划， 我在很多年以前就作决定了， 有很多事情对我来说并不是偶然， 因为都是我在积极的为将来做选择， 这就不多说了。 也有很多的东西， 对我来说， 都是规划以外的惊喜， 我叫做偶然。 小麦的幸福， 就是和心爱的人， 在简陋的旧家， 吃廉价的牛排， 喝廉价的红酒， 跳华尔兹舞。 我能够了解体会小麦幸福， 那种用拼搏用汗水用脑力用尽一生同甘共苦互相依赖换来的小麦幸福。 但是在我脑海里一直转的是这个问题: 虽然他们都沉浸在公主小妹的美梦里面， 但是到底有谁是能够和我一起过小麦幸福的呢? 我所谓的幸福， 并不是他们的幸福， 因为帅哥王子是需要很多别的东西砌堆成的。 而我，也渐渐开始看清什么跟什么了， 如果我更聪明一点， 就能够玩转世界， 只是没这个必要， 现在就很好。 哈哈。
听到张韶涵身体不好的消息， 真的希望她能快快的好起来， 健健康康的来新加坡开演唱会!!! 听到了这个消息不知不觉中感到好心疼喔。 似乎把现实生活中的她跟戏里的小麦深深地挂起了勾， 加油加油!! 虽然我还是超喜欢茉莉的。 本来以为茉莉会是个伤心的角色， 因为茉莉花这首歌本来就是悲伤的歌， 可是后来她以10年大计得到了幸福， 我真的是超开心的。 我也要加油， 认清我的幸福， 知道我能改变的， 了解什么是天运， 然后作出安详的计划来实现我的梦想!!! 穷人家的小孩要有打不死的蟑螂精神!!! 加油加油!!!
注: 有人曾经对我说， 生气就代表在乎。 所以对于那些想要生我气的人， 就省省力气吧。 因为相对来说， 我是不会在乎的。
干了!
阳。
3/08/2008 02:19:00 AM
Monday, February 18, 2008 Labels: 2008, bdae, Boring, CNY, GF, happy day, mahjong, Random words.
还是大过年
这个新年， 似乎被愁云密布所掩埋。 没有那么严重啦。 至少第一二三天还蛮开心的。 尤其是我家里的那个黄女士， 初二初三都有人来拜访， 跟她说说话， 乐得像个傻瓜。 哈哈。 所以在我心里， 我想也是时候带个人回家跟老妈子说说话了。 哈哈。 最近我发现， 我所想要的个体似乎越来越不关我的事了， 她在我身边似乎是为了充当一个能够满足我身边的人的任务， 而不是为了我了。 满足我的老妈子， 我的兄弟， 我的兄弟的女人， 之类之类。 哈哈。 当然， 最近有一个写的很好的文章， 告诉你我爱上一个人的时候到底是怎样的， 我个人阅读后觉得写得非常真实， 在这里就不阐述了。
话头又拉远了。 话说其他的天， 每天我都在埋头苦读。 人说十年寒窗苦读， 一朝金榜题名。 金榜题名就不用了， 我太吹了。 能够读完大学成功就业我就心满意足。 说到就业， 前两天看了梁导的一部戏叫"忽然发财"。 看了真的是心酸了。 吃钱! 你敢吃钱， 他妈的!!! 像小老鼠一样苦命挣扎苦命追求最后逃不出命运。 后来我看不下去了， 结局没看， 不知道最后是怎样的。 就好像禧马拉亚星一样， 哈哈。 很高兴， 我为了我自己不沉轮于世， 早就选择了这条路， 可是还不知道是不是对的。 也许始终， 我还是逃不掉。 不过正所谓， 每一段路都是一种领悟~~~~:)
哈哈。 又说远了。 该回到埋头苦读。 就是埋头苦读。 我想除了埋头苦读， 我也没有什么好说的了。 要不就是闲逛， 要不就是吃饭， 要不就是帮帮家里的忙。 哦这让我想起那天看SPOP万岁的广告， 那个主持人说蔡淳佳的生活过的很无聊， 过得很单调。 我想说的是， 我无聊我喜欢， 碍着你了啊， 干你屁事。 这当然是那些针对我说出一些话的人说的啦。 也许从来就没有人这样说我， 只是我心中的一些小小想法。 我喜欢我现在这样的生活， 虽然是无聊， 是乏味， 是空虚， 是寂寞。
只要有未知定数就谓赌。 所以不管你是做生意也好， 考状元也好， 谈恋爱也好， 为什么有人做得到有人做不到有人唯之以运有人说那是命? 这就意味着不是一加一等于二。 不过， 也似乎有人可以看清那一切来给一个很好的方案， 只是我懒得改变世界， 改变自己。 所以说嘛， 人生一大赌， 我赌的就是脱离着苦海。 只是， 有时候我忘了， 我还深陷其中。
说到赌， 真开心， 我想真的是有beginner's luck这回事。 我平常打麻将是不赌钱的。 可是今天去庆祝olivia和junkhee的二十一岁生日的时候就决定小赌怡情， 跟他们玩一玩。 结果本钱是十一块， 我赢了十块。 还自摸清一色!! 真的是很开心。 哇哈哈哈。 真的是不赌不知时运高， 不嫖不知身体好。 我不需要知道， 我的身体本来就很好。 哇哈哈哈哈。
他们说愁云满天的时候比较出口成章。 当然也可以是出口成脏。 但是今天这样开心， 所以过去几天想到的， 想要记下来的东西全都忘了。 改天吧。 哇， 如果今天我又看到她那就太完美了。 哇哈哈哈。 做人不要贪心。 要知道人在做， 天在看。 也要知道人生不如意十之八九， 所以我妈妈常说要常想一二。 哈哈哈。 What a perk up!:)
干杯！
阳
2/18/2008 12:57:00 AM
Thursday, February 07, 2008 Labels: 2008, CNY, happy day, huangchengyeyun, song lyrics, 流浪
大过年!!!
我觉得这个世界上再也没有一首更好笑的歌
"开封有个包青天...翻天鼠， 身轻如燕...."
怎么了， 你觉得不是很好笑吗? 相信我， 改天我找给你看， 这是世界上最好笑的歌了。
我很怀念这种笑法， 似乎只记得是在黄城里才有， 笑到肚子痛还要笑的笑。 笑到不行了， 还要继续搞笑， 还要继续演， 继续笑。 开心， 笑声， 和众人之间的默契是息息相关的。 也和众人的才气牵扯在一起。 笑声和力量， 借助他人的， 一层一层的叠叠叠， 越来越高， 无法自拔。 一群人就这样疯了。 这就是我最初想要进黄城的梦想吧。 就为了这舜间迸发的火花。 久违了，这瞬间迸发的火花。 可惜的是， 这样的我， 似乎离现在的我是越来越tmr远了。 我越来越冷静了。 我并没有怨言， 因为这是为了更靠近我的理想， 还有我和现实的妥协。 也许吧， 这两年我会这样过真的是因为我完完全全把演员这个角色丢出窗外了。 好想好想好想找回那种感觉哟。 只是斜一步我已来到不一样的海阔天空。 却开始在怀念那曾经拥有的辽阔天地。 我想聪明如我， 会有办法的。 我也开始更加了解自己了。 如果真的可以找到这样的一个人， 一个如此疯狂的人， 那也不枉绑住自己了。 演戏的是疯子， 一点都没错。
伟利说我最近好像很堕落颓废的样子。 我想一半是对的， 一半是他自己想的。 觉得很不痛快。 只有这么一点点。 应该是寂寞吧。
干杯!
阳
2/07/2008 02:03:00 AM
Sunday, September 30, 2007 Labels: Angel., chenqizhen, happy day, music
陈绮贞 A Piece of Summer 2007 新加坡演唱会
我心中的吉他手。
从演唱会的兴奋到现在， 在我心里只有一句话: She ROX!
闭上眼睛， 我还能看见你就在面前。 你看到我， 你对着我笑。 我举起双手， 无可救药的告诉你: 我爱你! 我爱你! 我用尽所有美好梦想。 就算和别人享有你每一个假动作。
She ROX!
她实现了我所有的梦想。 一起合唱， 一起呐喊， 一起尖叫， 一起举起双手， 一起疯狂， 在一起的美好感觉。 每一天都是一种练习， 和你在一起的感觉。 我的声音， 无可救药的给了你， 消失在人群之中。 和你擦身而过的感觉真的是很好。 疯狂的向你挥挥手， 好漂亮哟你! 长长的红色头发! 真的很感谢你， 如果不是有今晚， 我也真的从来不会知道自己是多么需要这一切的感觉。 不算是一种释放， 不算是一种松懈， 不是一种解脱， 不是一种放纵， 不是一种发泄， 不是一种爆发突破。 只算是， 我好久好久好久好久都没有体验的一种力量， 一种告诉我， 你不是真的离开我， 你也不愿这样的夜里把难过留给我。
She ROXXX!!!
Cheer 陈绮贞!
Yang =)
9/30/2007 01:24:00 AM
Friday, May 04, 2007 Labels: Finisher, happy day, pros, Random words., ward
I got a Big Fat B for MicroB!!!
Alright, I guess the title sums up all I want to say for this post. Its so finally that I am in year3. Been through so much things, from anat, physio, biochem to microb and neuro. I guess these things, are not yet thru for me forever, especially now with elementary clinics everything is coming to haunt me again "what is the 12 cranial nerves?" "What causes tea color urine that decolorises in sunlight?" "Which spinal cord segments is for ankle jerk?" "HS1S2?!?!" "This px is allergic to penicillin, so what can you give her for her cellulitis?" Wahseh. Come haunt me. Glad to have all of you back. I can be top student (No, sorry just talking cock).
Eclinics had been good this week. At least I wanted to try to make it better for everyone. Tues was labour day, stayed at home and studied (Whee!!). Been to OT with my happified CG mates, I guess the first time inside is happifying, but its kinda boring haha, maybe I only looked like a surgeon. Clerking patient gives tremendous satisfaction when you make something good and complete out of it, for me and for the patient. Doing neuro test gives tremendous self confidence boosting because its all showmanship. Looking, listening and knowing nice doctors who are willing to teach, enthu to teach and are ever so happy so cheeky and so chubby yet so demanding but will give the nod if you just say something right just makes the day so much better. I kinda want to do neurologist (but its so hard to get there I know the people there are like all champions in their time), what is the diff between neurologist and psychiatrist? One is poorer?
Yesterday I was looking opposite at RI when I was waiting for my bus to come. I saw people running 2.4. I saw some kids stopping and cannot run anymore. I was like that in the past. I was the only one in my class who cannot complete 2.4 in time. Its like I will always run slower than the others at the start, and at the same time be the first to start walking. At that time i always think that I am just slow and can never get any better, please, fast people can only get faster and slow people will always be slow. As I look at them, I know that I can do better than them now and myself then, but at the same time, I am still the slowest. At that point in time I remember telling myself, things can only go better if you push, you can always do what you want, its just how long it takes to get there, dun compare with other people, 只跟自己比赛， thats what it means now I know. Just push. Let everything go through, then at the end of this can look back, and know how much I had gone through, and can know how much I have archieved, and let that be the new motivation to push even further. Jia you.
Felt kinda stupid when I was thinking about how stupid I was when I was sosososososososososo freaked out by viral CA at the start of this yr2. Actually it wasnt stupid. It was good that I got freaked out and mugged hard, though not as hard or rather results not as good as the other friends. But now that I had gone through everything, the stupid grade can really stop haunting me, I felt that time was kind of like, messy lousy and stupid. Thanks all for all the support and guidance and notes and advices and mneumonics and everything. Especially STERL TSB JP QY WEIX CHRIS WL YH STEPH WZ IVAN RON SAM LW CL RAYL KH XX(for freaking me out) BEAN NQ RYAN SER and many many more. Ohyah thanks counsellor and counselleee..:)
Cheers!
Yang =)
5/04/2007 09:50:00 PM
Saturday, April 28, 2007 Labels: happy day, movie, Random words., Silly questions
CSFC first week.
Someone mentioned very aptly "We are here, just to meet our clients earlier than all the rest of the undergraduates". 一语惊醒梦中人. Many times I fall into my own very little inferiority complex. Facing the hectic-ness in ward rounds, demandings of senior consultants, lack of sleep on my own, I become closed. Closed. The last thing that I want in such a time of change. Open up. I guess everything is ready. The whole universe had conspired already, for something that should had happened in my life. Ready just for me to perform and rise to the occasion. This time, 我可以.
That sentence summarizes clinical years, academic years can be summarized by one activity, "learning vocabularies".
Things can be as simple as what you want to be. Every man for himself. These two things finally shook their hands in my mind. Life is but, the simplest being, death. Everything else, is just some how some sort of complications that we want to get ourselves into. Responsibilities, faith, trust, care and concern, love, everything is for a better good, yet, complicates our lives, for the better good of all of us, really good? Things change as time progresses, no doubt what is good is always good I realized in the end, and what is old time truth will be true (bah.) but without those bad things, where can I see the goodness, bad things are but, for the better good of all of us. Whole universe conspired to make me a better man.
Someone commented not understanding why people like to listen to soppy music. Neither understanding, why do people love until so sad. I know. I know why you don't understand. Because you see things differently, different from all of us. The most important thing to do in life, I might say, is to keep self happy, or rather, is to do what we think needs to be done. This is because I dislike the idea that you said that these people are happy to be sad in love. I think, its more like, they throw their needs in as they got swept by love. Its just like, why we curse and get frustrated when we study for exams.
As for soppy songs, for me, its all dreaming about things that had never happened in my life, except for, Eason - k 歌之王。
Kind of forgot what are my hobbies again. I was thinking, why I seem less happy and carefree when I was in university. One big reason I must say, is that I don't sing songs so often, like sing anywhere, unlike in younger days. Closed liao. If changes go on as it is, I should be looking into a better life. I tend to give a lot to other people, without thinking that there should be anything back. But when someone like that comes along, giving me more than what I give and not expecting anything back, I tend to not know what to do. I don't know how to handle myself. Opps.
My mother described me as "冷热无常". She said she saw that in my palmistry too. That is how I will say myself too. I have my own reasons, though not rational at all. "Next time better time, next deal better deal." -my 座右铭 when I play Settlers of Catan.
I want my 座右铭 for CSFC to be, "Ok!, Lets Go!"
武士的一分 was nice, nicer than nada sou sou (haha). At least, that scene was super super super exciting and breath stopping. "Uncle do you have increase in heart beat and shortness of breath?" Like I can see us sitting up and heart pounding. I so so so so much like takuya kimura! Haha. He is like how suave, how determined, how I want to be like him. There's always a purpose for everything, just that when and whether you see it or not. Now I see my purpose. Only those who put in everything to break through everything will finally get the simplest things in life. Thanks for being there.
Cheers!
Yang =)
4/28/2007 02:50:00 AM
Sunday, April 22, 2007 Labels: happy day, read, song lyrics
Reading
I will remember that I said to myself today : 三日不读书，面目可憎. Cant believe it I had been reading stuffs for two days and totally felt refreshing. Had not been feeling so for such a long time. Waha, seems like I had not been having a good reading experience in my m2 years, especially with the 6 months intensive studying stint, which I still don't know how well did I do.
Anyway here's the song.
Artist: The Coral
Song : In The Morning
Lyrics:
Shut the bedroom window in the morning
Go to the shop, make plans to be leaving
In the morning...
Thought I was sleeping,
it was just a dream,
An alleycat chewing on dead leaves
In the morning...
Out of the dark and into the light
When the morning comes
I will be alright
When I leave I try not to wake her
Tiana toast to yesterday's capers
In the morning....
She wrote my name on a red telephone box
When I got there she'd already rubbed it off
In the morning....
Out of the dark and into the light
When the morning comes I will be alright
And all this time I've watched it change
But it's still the same
In the morning...
In the morning...
In the morning...
In the morning...
Haha, one times funny song.
Cheers!
Yang =)
4/22/2007 10:39:00 PM
Labels: book, dance, exercise, guanyimma, happy day, holidays, movie, musical, Random words.
12 days of holz (well Christmas is not here yet)
I guess its not right not to blog anything about my short holiday stint before my preclinicals. Furthermore, it was one of the most exciting, refreshing and intense holidays. I felt blissed. Ohwell, except for the fact that I did not have any internet until yesterday, otherwise perfect.
Watched nada sou sou on last Thursday. I guess there's just so many things to think about, when there are so many things which I can link to my life now. But of course, not during the show, mainly after that. Conclusion is that, I am just glad with what I have now, and if life makes it this way for me, then this way will be the best for me. I have the ability to make a difference, and now I know which is those I should make a difference.
Argentina Tango dance class on Thursday. I guess I am the traditional conservative type. Was simply red-flushed-faced-menopausal-like-not-but-testosterone-charged when dancing. But I welcome the new experience. But I guess to go for it further or not depends also on the flow of things, from what I see now, I guess nope. It was a really really good experience, something which I guess until the next hotter dancer comes about, will never be forgotten. I still think having a class with outside people is good, because that will make everyone capable of becoming a teacher. Everyone is a teacher, an old but newly made conscious idea, hmm. In any case pay so little for so much friends and teacher, zhuan dao liao!
Sleep deprivation caffeine study from Friday to Tuesday. I guess this is one of those things which I can list down as one of the most memorable events in my life. Firstly, made 2 new good friends, Kevin Kok and Yi Kang. Its not that I don't know them, but its just that its my 1st nature to ignore people I never had the chance to talk to. So I am really really glad that this event made us friends, cheers to more years of playing settlers of Catan! Hurhur. Woo I realized that settlers is such an addictive and nice game to play, next time shall play it again at the settler's cafe. Haha. Gian. Anyway, all of us talked alot during the thing, and I got to know more about myself, my inadequates (as usual) and alot more. I guess THAT was just for pure fun, nothing intense or hurting meant, haha. Thanks guys.
Secondly, I learnt alot during the sleep deprivation period. I had first hand experience of how people work, deteriorate and whats the best and worst of people. Thats by observing other people. For myself, it was a period of almost going into madness. Its like being drunk at some point in time. At first, I can hear normally, then, I start to hear everything at the same amplitude, ie I am unable to differentiate between what is important to me and what is just background noise. Then I can't hear anything, including what is spoken directly to me, everything just turned into background noise, distant and muted. And come lastly everything just collapse and I turned into a panic state because I simply cant connect myself to the world. Lucky for me, things did not go further worse, otherwise I wont be here to type things. It goes the same with the thinking function, and the motor function. I guess at some point in time, I was able to sleep with my eyes open. Hmm.
Throughout the study, especially at the most critical time, I kept on recurring what you had said, that its amazing what people can do for money. We both saw it in nada sou sou, however untrue it seems, that people, really, can put in alot alot alot just for the sake of money, and its not a spur of rashness, but its something that can last for a very long time. Until, until when everything comes to a stop. Thats when money, is not important anymore. But before that, there's so much things that we need to juggle, and money, turns us into slaves so things can flow as we wanted. Random words again.
Ohyah, during the study, one song became meaningful in my life because of its participation in it. "In the morning, dudodudodudodududu. "
Handroll for breakfast! Chup Chye for lunch and dinner, yucks. Super rings rocks!! Cup noodles for supper. I kind of missed mian chum chum, haha.
I also learnt about the gold standard in functional testing. Wah that is just so sleep inducing and one of the most boring things I had ever seen. Settlers of Catan should be a better gauge of prefrontal function.
Wu niang did not appear despite my plea for it. Chiobus was there, but just for entertainment and morale-boosting sake. I guess its time to stop being childish, everyone needs something to survive for. I look out for my own happiness. And as someone roared to me, happiness is mine!
First hand watched babysitter juggling 8 kids. Haha. Thats kinda fun considering who is the babysitter. Don't be stupid lah, sometimes, just abit of cooperation from everyone makes everyone's life easier, and the money more worth it. I learnt that in a peaceful manner.
Maybe got more about the study, but things seem like a dream and went passed. Hence could not write more about it. Heehee paiseh will write more if I can think of.
Phantom of the Opera on Tuesday. We ate at NYDC to celebrate weilei's birthday before that. I like the food there, its rather nice, but I guess its time for me to move on, because the thing now is eating at NYDC saves money, and I remembered of the first time when I ate at NYDC, I thought it was super ex. After that was in the esplanade, saw a few old people. I like the show very much!! I love the set!! I love the candles that comes out from nowhere! I love the dry ice that knows where to settle down and not flood the whole stage!! I love the boat!! I love the stair and the masquerade!! I love how they huan4 chang3!! Simply love it the way that they make props and set so nice!! I love the stage too, it reflects perfectly when light is shined from top down!! Oh I love the stars and the city scene when the two characters are heyheying!! I love the music!! I love the songs!! I love the ballet dancers!! I love the clothes!! I love the elephant that comes out in the first scene!! I love the bridge!! Ohman. It was amazing, and considering its the first time for me to watch a professional production, I simply love it. I know why once again I love the stage and drama so much. There's just simply so much dreams, hopes, effects, love and showmanship which I love. And for 52 bucks, I love it. Muacks!
Running and gym on Wed. Exercise rocks! Frees me from all the earthly thinkings and makes me a free-er person.
Was on this project on Thursday. It was my dream in RI to do alot of it. But I guess, for the path that I had picked for myself, and life helped me in doing so, I guess, I can still do alot of it. I want to do it!! But, not as how others are doing it.
Went to guanyimma temple on Friday. I was really confused about two things. For one of them, the answer was to look for it is like being in the sea without a compass, which is simply one word, lost. And to look for the compass, is like looking for a needle in the sea, one word again, lost. So doubly lost. Doubly confused. The point being, to control something that is doubly lost makes you even more lost, triply lost. For things that can't be done anything about, simply let it go and things will fall in place nicely the next time when you look at it. Hopefully.
For the other one, when things are thought through and nicely planned, simply press the auto mode and let things work their way out. Some unexpected matters might occur along the way, but thats none for you to know now. For now, if you feel that you already did what you can and had put in your best for the future, simply let it go and things will fall in place nicely the next time when you look at it. Hopefully.
Two things confused, two sayings, one conclusion, how easy things can be!
For the rest of Friday, read the alchemist. I guess its my type of book. I will write something like that if I have the time. The ideas in it aligns with mine quite well, but no I am not going to turn myself into the wind nor talk to the hand that writes all these. I mean, I know what the idea in the book is trying to say, and somehow somewhat, I kind of think in that way too. I am weird and maybe a freak.
Sat was bball and soccer at hwachong double whammy. Now thats what I call non-stop action! Weak-end warriors!! I mean week-end warriors!! It sounds good exercise rocks and friendship is good. After what you said, I start to think about things in a different light, yes what you said is true, true-er than mine, but I am a simple person who have simpler goals, so let me be. Another thing that happened is me making myself happy. No I never play chess for quite long already.
Sunday is today. I can make it happier. 7am in school tmr, earliest ever man.
Cheers!
Yang =)
4/22/2007 10:31:00 AM
Thursday, April 12, 2007 Labels: happy day, movie, Random words.
1st day post pros.
Have you ever experienced this. That you are doing something for someone and you are feeling so stupid about doing it (maybe because that something is stupid in the first place) and you don't understand at all why are you doing this and for what for who you are doing this. And mind you, this is not about something heyhey. If you are doing something stupid for a heyhey then its still ok, because only the ending will decide if that something you did is stupid or not, but just that at that point in time you feel stupid, its ok. But. I still don't know why and still feeling stupid.
Thats why I am so touched by nada sou sou. Like the scene of the typhoon, the guy was feeling how stupid, and at that point the numerous stupid times of me bubbled up and flooded me. Ohman I feel like crying. But then its true that, for people like me, I start to not understand that why everything must go in that direction. I know, I like to go there also, but had never ever been there, but then, I think I am used to what I have now. Thanks.
I quite like nada sou sou, because I am deeply engrossed into the show. Usually I am easily distracted by other people and things in the cinema, but for this show I give it thumbs up. Maybe because the girl and guy were too 赏心悦目. Haha. But then, as I had mentioned, that sometimes, things can be just so pure. I hope.
Erm. I should be more professional in things.
Anyway, I realised I am not busy at all. Which is kinda a bad feeling because everyone else is busy. I should find back a hobby, or try to upgrade myself more. In any case, why I am not busy is also because I have no dreams. I realised that I have no dreams already. Thats why. Yesterday was watching engine. I think my biggest dream now is to have a happy family. No matter how small how insignificant how un-nobel how 理所当然 how everyone-can-do-it how self-centred is your dream, its still a dream, its still a dream, please give me some respect, and some hope, and dignity, and trust, and tell me I can do it, no matter how small, I also thank you. 请不要践踏我的梦想。 I still believe in love.
Cheers!
Yang =)
4/12/2007 11:48:00 PM
Thursday, March 29, 2007 Labels: happy day, Random words.
今天..
..is happy day!! Wah today is really a day of awakening. After the j*b** post I posted yesterday which I am so tempted to delete it away. Its just so face throwing. Wad was I thinking when I wrote that. Hm. But anyway, just glad that things got better today on my part. I mean. Its really problem on my part. So sien. So stupid. So lousy. But I am good now.
Was feeling quite bad today. Especially after talking to some friends about some problem then got me into some thinking. Ok the last sentence reminds me of someone who once told me that its very 敷衍 to say "some, some, some, some and some". Haha. Sorry. 敷衍 you all. Anyway, later decided to do an old chinese tradition activity, which you have to pay NT500 in Taiwan for someone to do it. Hey I can do it on my own! Ok its 测字. Meaning you write a word that you are thinking about, and related to your problem and the person will say what is the problem and what you are thinking and how should you go about doing it from the word. Its really the test of the essence of chinese language. Wah. Guess what word I thought. 贤!!! Ok. Seems like nobody will ever know whats the problem. But here's my own ten cents worth of 测字, but if you find me to 测字, please pay me S$25.:)
贤 is make up of 2 "1"s, 1 "又" and 1 "贝".
"贝" means money as most of you might not know.
"又" that means the problem is recurrening.
"又""贝" means its the problem of money again.
"又" + "贝" makes it a 观. It means to look.
2 "1"s is like a river flowing down.
2 "1"s + "又" seems like someone looking down into the river.
有道是"船到桥头自然直", so it goes to say that there's no point in fretting, stand by the river, look as the river flows, and when the boat comes it will naturally be straight.
贝者，钱也。 有道是"有钱能使鬼推墨", 又有人说"有钱能使墨推鬼"。 无论怎么说，有钱就是好! 但是，别忘了，钱不是万万都能，只能做根本基础升级。 所谓贤不只是聪明， 是还能知命。 知大势所趋。 刘备说得好"尽其本分，不可与命抗也。" 隔岸观火还不够，生命的泉流有时也要隔岸观。
我知道了。
There's this feeling, that all are back already, at least for the time being, at least some are back already. I feel it already, so am feeling happy again. Haha.
Cheers!
Yang =)
3/29/2007 09:15:00 PM
Friday, March 23, 2007 Labels: happy day, huangchengyeyun
Entirely happyfied.
Today was a very boring day. Like, read about Respiratory Syncytial Virus, Adenovirus, Coronavirus, SARS, Herpes Simplex 1, Herpes Simplex 2, Varicella-Zoster Virus, Epstein Barr Virus, Cytomegalovirus, HHV-6, Kaposi's Sacoma, Dengue Virus, Hanta virus, Japanese Encephalitis, and I am not even half way through virus. Utterly confused and bored. Like how bored can I be. I need to be motivated. After gym was much better, like after seeing how friend N grabbed friend Q yesterday, was utterly convinced that I want to be something like him, at least, he looks cool, won't get bullied. Haha. So after gym did somemore studying, and hence, bored.
So decided to come home and cook something for myself and make myself happier. Yep happier. Wahaha. Felt entirely satisfied eating my own cooked food. No, I wont get cysticercosis.
Then decided to come online to talk to people since my sms-es are all gone liao. But turned out that it became a more stressed and pissified moment. Hm. I think. 我们都累了，这条路走了太久。 但是东西一开始了，就不会有完结吧。 至少，完结，并不是我们想像的。 而是，无限无尽的一直下去。 也许会有尽头，但至少现在的我还是看不到。 我不了解，所以不多说。 知道的越多，其实才知道自己不知道的是那么多。 所以，越说越少。 只做少说。 我希望我自己可以成为一个靠得住的人，但是对不起，我好想说"我不做老大已经很久了"。 Sorry its just me I procrastinate too much, 不配做老大。 本来就不想做的嘛。 人说力不从心，嘿嘿。
So decided to read blogs. Realised that alot people updated their blogs furiously during the period that I did not read their blog. So fierce. Then I read friend A's blog. Wahseh. I am always impressed by friend A's 文笔. Everytime I always ask myself how did friend A pen down all these thoughts. Sometimes I have those thoughts, but, how to make it so nice. Mine is just pure rambling. Mine is just pure, rubbish. Ohwell. For the latest post on the blog, friend A penned down the exact feelings when I watched huangcheng. I shouted "exactly!" when I read. Utterly happified. Had not been feeling so excited for some time liao. Though friend A went to watch another drama. But I guess, we all feel the same. At this level, its hard for us to go back to the crowd, we can never, fall deeply into it. If you are free, read the blog and get a feel.
Cheers!
Yang =)
3/23/2007 11:02:00 PM